I am currently working on my first book - a business memoir - revisiting many experiences, both in my business and personal life. The writing process has allowed me to look at each in retrospective and with a new level of awareness. In doing so, I can see that my true intuition didn’t kick in till my mid 30’s… actually, that’s not true, it was there the whole time, I just wasn’t able to hear it….
I’ve lived a lot of my adult life in a realm of extreme thinking. In my early 20’s that was in the form of devil-may-care, try anything once, including starting a business when I had absolutely no money & no idea how to actually run one.
Was it reckless? Yes. Was it naïve? Yes. Did my extreme thinking kickstart me on my journey to where I am today? …Yes.
I would credit my extreme thinking as a creative & brand builder as corner-stone of the success I found in my career.
In a way, the naivety was like an access all areas to think big & just leap, to make like Nike and just do it. When I was able to add experience & maturity to extreme thinking & it harnessed my talents as a Creative Director.
Somewhere along the way, for the point of context I am going to pin drop it in my very late 20’s, with Naivety moved out, a new tenant – Fear - quietly moved in.
I couldn’t tell you the exact day or time that the lease was signed but Fear quickly made itself known as a really shitty tenant. Late night noisy parties that would keep me up to all hours, he would invite his mates Anxiety and Worry over, and together they would wreak absolute havoc on the interiors.
My Extreme Thinking on business and life ideas would flourish in the light, and Fear and Anxiety would lead the Catastrophic Thinking in the dark. They were similar extremes but took my mind to very different places.
Maybe the two extreme thinking’s were neighbours the entire time - I’m not sure - but for a lot of years I had to find a way for them to live beside each other, continually negotiating between them as they just yelled over the top of the other.
Being in the constant role of negotiator was not only exhausting, but it didn’t allow me any perspective on anything, and without perspective, it can often feel like you are living in a continual state of reaction. That is not a sustainable, or pleasant place to reside. It was tumultuous and tiring and by the time I was in my mid 30’s I had to find a way to quieten one of them, and it was the Catastrophic Thinking that I needed to pipe down.
To quieten it, I first had to listen to it. And to truly listen to it, I had to go and sit really closely to it.
So I did, we met in it’s most comfortable place, Darkness, and I listened. I asked it why it carried on the way it did and why it made me feel the way I felt, and in doing so, I start to understand it better. It wasn’t easy, or quick, its actually still an ongoing conversation, but now it doesn’t yell as loud.
I actually appointed a new landlord, her name is Intuition.
I’d seen her around the neighbourhood for years, but we never really spoke, I was too busy with the band of misfits I’ve listed above.
But one day I heard her. She was calm and composed, and I asked her if she wanted to hang out more often. She said she had been waiting for me to asked her, I apologized for not extending the invite sooner.
So, Intuition and I started hanging out; usually we chat when we exercise, or go to meditation together, well, she’s chats, I listen. She is savvy, I’m learning to trust her more and more, she is always right (even when I don’t take her advice)and she has a very calm way about her. She actually was the one who helped me make the biggest decision of my life, to close the SAMANTHA WILLS jewellery business.
The perspective that Intuition has given me has allowed room for me to reflect on the past 15 years and to do so by way of writing a business memoir. The book is about the duality of being a female founder and Creative Entrepreneur that found herself in a public facing role quite early in life, alongside the girl who was also trying to work life – and a noisy mind - out along the way.
I will be speaking at the Business Chicks Founders Talks in Australia late this month,and will be speaking about intuition and how we are actually being guided in many ways all the time, its just that we are not always listening…
Tickets and venue dates are available HERE. Intuition got her ticket a while ago, Anxiety and Fear will be there too (they used to sit right up the front at these types of things and heckle me, but now they usually sit right up the back and keep pretty quiet for the better part of it). Extreme and Catastrophic Thinking, may be there, but probably not, they do most of their work in the lead up to it, but either way, I look forward to introducing them all to you.
But Intuition, She’s the one I really want you to meet. - SWx